Sunday, July 30, 2006

Death can no longer carry the scythe
A benevolent white sickle
Pushing a soft song through not-yet gold wheat

Death is an outstretched hand
and soul-soothing lies
A cool canteen in the desert, whose sand tastes like hot iron
rubbed against the throat

Death is the trail that leads you
out of faceless eastern woods
and into a plain, warm

In which can be heard
the swish, swish
of a golden white sickle.

Saturday, July 22, 2006

This is where I work. I say that 'cus it's a fucking shipwreck.

Seriously. Check it out at

Here's what I need from whoever can make this happen -

I want a bar. Not just any bar - a quiet bar. With good, soft lighting. A dark stained wood floor, one pool table and a clean, mid-size bar with good American and select European beers on tap. And in place of the fancy rack of funky candy-colored liquours, a little rack of core American liquours, with some imported mainstays. And no funky, faggoty metrosexual-ass drinks like appletinis or Goddamn fuzzy navels.

For clientele, I want working folk. And not the dumb, young, unskilled guys that you find these days. Craftsmen, union joes, veterans, people who take pride in their trade. And no college kids, no prty-hardy types, none of that.

And no booming-ass music, neither. A jukebox. With decent sound and a cultured collection, built around a core of Johnny Cash and Hank Williams tunes. Music that will work, not whine.

I want a quiet little bar with a sunny parking lot and a nice, simple patio and experienced courteous staff and people who I want to drink with. A place where I can take my prematurely aged ass and just sit down.

Because I really wanna sit down and take a break, dammit.

So if you all could make this happen, I would appreciate it.

I'm looking at you, Donohoe. You actually get a paycheck...
Lemme put this out, too. While I'm here and woke.

Why do people hate on the Pope and the Vatican? It is a pleasant place full of pleasant people, and the Pope is a lot nicer than most people you'll meet. And I guarantee you backwoods anti-papists that he is not the Anti-Christ.

He's actually quite nice.

Go find someone else to hate on. You all are pissing me off. But I gotta make nice, 'cus I'm Catholic.

You can't see it, but this polite smile is fake as shit. I'm actually pissed as hell.

Lemme put this out, while I'm at it.
I loves my wife.
Israel. Pissing me off.

This is my new favorite stress-inducing topic. Am I the only who gets pissed off when Israel gets away with blowing the shit out of another country with zero consequences?

I understand that Israel has the right to exist-that is a basic fact and cannot be debated. I also understand their right, nay, need for a robust capacity for self-defense. But the first-strike pattern that Israel has adopted is inexcusable. Here is a country that is in essence a thoecracy with universal compulsory military service. This and the plethora of reserve forces for citizens who are not of military age strikes me as over the top. I don't think this is right. No military can function succesfully with manpower that is culled from the populace and forced to serve, vice a motivated and professional volunteer force. It is a fact that drafting personnel creates a military with a mindset that permits and overlooks wartime atrocity. This, combined with the never-ending flow of sophisticated arms and training tools and methods coming from the United States seems like a one-sided vendetta against the bulk of the Islamic nations (which are also primarily theocracies and also rely on compulsory military service.) What is the motivation? Self-defense? Or the eradication of any and all possible threats? What of the civilians? They did nothing to deserve this, save being Lebanese(which is not a crime in any way, dammit). In essence- it ain't fair. And is that not the goal of the world community, especially the diplomatic/political community? A measure of fairness that benefits all mankind? Military methods are the last resort. Always.

What I'm basically getting at is this - why does Israel feel the need to pummel it's neighbors? Because these operations will inevitably involve her allies in some way, shape, or form, and that ally, indirectly, by way of some DoN forms, is me. And I, being a well-trained, well-qualifed, motivated military professional will eventually be called on to do something that we all know just ain't right. I joined to become a better person and do something that would benefit the nation and the world as a whole. I did not join to do shady shit to benefit men who have no concept of the sacrifices myself and my shipmates make. I alsow did not join to star in my son's history textbooks, under the heading "World War 3." Am I overreacting? Maybe. But dammit, more people need to be worried about this - no, not worried, pissed. Pissed and doing something. Preferably somehting constructive and proactive.

However, before any NCIS cats read this and decide that my Navy days are over, allow me to say this - I have not, and do not plan to refuse any lawful order given to me. If they cut me orders and tell me to land some jarheads, or drive an LCU and put ass in the grass, then okay. I'll do it. And I'll do it to the best of my ability.

But Goddamn, I won't be happy about it.

So now that I've wandered off-topic and written myself into a corner, allow me to say this - stop bombing each other. Everyone. There is a time and a place when war is appropriate, but this - this ain't it. I cannot find the motivation for this destruction. It would be so easy to do the adult thing and admit past fault, while working toward future stability. Whose side are you all on, anyway? Who authorized this bullshit? And why is the UN, potentially the most powerful body of nations ever seen, with the collective strength of the mightiest navies and armies, sitting in meetings with collective thumbs in ass? Meetings do not solve problems. Meetings cause headaches and make folk sleepy.

Makes me sick. Sick and fucking tired. There are better things we all could be doing.

Saturday, July 15, 2006

67 countries have said it, and now I'ma say it too.

Israel-yes, you. Don't look over there, look here. Yes, at me. Now...


I know you're fucked up. Everyone else knows you're fucked up. So when are you going to unfuck yourself and quit with the commando bullshit? Knock this shit off. Or I'm putting you in time out.

Friday, July 14, 2006

It has come to my attention recently that there is entirely too much stress in my life, and that it's mostly my own damn fault for putting it there. So, as an excercise in stress management, here is a list of things that piss me off;

- Men with bad haircuts. This pisses me off on a daily basis-why do grown men feel that they can walk around with long, greasy, untamed hair, or, worse, military men who let their hair grow up and out, outside of regulations.

- The dress-shirt and jeans fad. A dress shirt, to me, can only be worn one way-tucked the fuck in to the trousers. Letting your shit hang out is slovenly and makes you look like a Goddamn idiot.

- Flip flops. You wear them on the beach, Around the house. Or in the shower. You do not, under any circumstances, wear them outside, running errands, or to your job. Esepcially if your job is waiting tables. What the fuck?

- Adults who cannot bring themselves to shave in the morning. You look like trash. Fix yourselves.

- Driving without signalling/driving on the phone. You all can go to hell. Now. You'll get there faster if you hang up.

- People with dependents who spend money on frivolous material goods vice saving and investing wisely. You bastards owe your families first, then yourselves. Rims and speakerboxes will not keep your children in diapers. Nor will they pay the rent.

- Overweight females who dress "sexy." It's not sexy. It's fucking gross. Go reclaim your dignity.

- Anyone with dental ornamention. If God or the dentist didn't put it there, it don't belong there. Get it the fuck our of your mouth. I can't understand what you say.

- Anyone who constantly asks to borrow small amounts of money. Especially immediately after payday. You got paid. Get off your ass and go get some cash. Or just save it. But don't ask me for my money.

- People who constantly insert themselves into your conversations, even though they have no fucking clue what the conversation is about. This also applies to you sons of bitches who keep trying to start coinversations by spitting the same line out every three seconds. It's fucking annoying. If I want to talk to you, I'll come talk to you. Wait until I do. Don't jump the fucking gun.

- Anyone who uses payday loans. You deserve to get fucked up and pay far, far out the ass for your mistakes. And don't tell me about them. Keep them to yourself.

- People who can't get to work on time. Ever. Stop making excuses, go to bed earlier, and wake up earlier. It's not hard, jackasses.

- Sailors, soldiers, Marines, Airmen who wear uniforms that are too large or too small. You don't look cool-you're a Goddamn fire hazard. And you look fucking retarded.

- Anyone who goes out drinking on a weeknight. What the hell? Friday will come. It has always come, and it will continue to come. Just sit tight, dammit.

- People who wear do-rags in public. Go inside. And stay there.

- People who work in industrial settings, but refuse to take off their fancy watches. I hope your whole hand gets took off by a big ass machine.

- Anyone who refuses to do a job which they volunteered for. Rest assured, I will kick your ass. Just let me find you.

- Anyone who considers themselves a gangster, but is in fact NOT a gangster. In fact, anyone who tries to be something they ain't. You suck at life. Quit wasting your time and energy trying to convince me. Got fix yourselves.

-Desk clerks, cashiers, waiters, and bartenders who refuse to get ogff the phone while serving me. IT CAN FUCKING WAIT.

- Anybody with a large-ass truck that never gets used for chores or hauling. You are wasting precious fuel and steel, and you should be shot dead.

- Guys with riding lawnmowers and really small lawns. Go die, you bastards.

- Anyone in really baggy pants. Die.

-People who wait until the last minute to take care of vital business. You are all fucking yourselves, and should not be allowed to complain in any way, shape or form. Nor should you be granted any leniency. You should be hung. In public. Along with everyone else on this list.

- Anyone who claims that soccer and swimming are not sports. You can't play soccer. Nor can you swim. So you are not qualified to pass judgement.

- College kids with Che Guevara t-shirts or pro-Communist logos. You motherfuckers have no idea how destructive and evil Communism is. You should be shipped off to some bombed-out Eastern European nation, to experience first-hand the fallout of the Soviet collapse and reverberations that are still felt there. Or China. China sucks right now.

That's part of the list. There's more, but I should stop.